The Spy Who Was Loved


Sometimes the words don’t come out like I want them too. That’s what happened with this guest post for my dear Compel sister Jill Hoven. She asked me to write for her beautiful blog Follow His Footprints, and I wanted to tell a story about how God was remaking me into a whole person with a new identity. But as my fingers typed, I realized I was trying to do a covert op by hiding behind who I wanted to be.

Although wholeness is the end goal of my story, this narrative is more about being honest and letting God blow my cover—completely. 

Changing My Identity

I’ve always wanted to be a spy. A black-suited world-traveling hero adept at accents and disguises, thwarting evil with a swift karate chop and remaining cool under any lie detector test. I used to be a pretty good one: telling bold-faced lies as a kid, changing my Southern accent in college, and later, hiding emotions. As any good CIA show will dramatize, a spy is usually a spy because of a broken backstory. I have one too.

Recently my husband and I were jogging and discussing our new food tracking regime. He questioned me when I insisted this had everything to do with health and absolutely nothing to do with feeling better about myself.

An agent will go to any length to keep her identity and secrets safe in the name of national security, which happens to be self-protection for me.

He busted me in prime stealth mode.

Walk this way with me to read the rest of the story…

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September 15, 2016