IDENTITY: Finding the Proverbs 31 Woman in the Middle of Kid Chaos

Words by Shauna Blaak

The Proverbs 31 Woman―you either love her, or you hate her. She will either inspire you to greatness, or she will remind you of your weakness.

Rising early, working late? No thanks.

I can’t compete with that. I am definitely not a morning person. Does that really mean that I’m NOT a Proverbs 31 Woman too?

Great. More guilt!

Years ago, when the kids were little, I remember having a conversation with the Father in the middle of Walmart, of all places. (Yes, God shops at Walmart.)

I had been complaining to Him about how busy I was. I couldn’t compete with all of the other super moms around me who really had it together. I wasn’t rich enough. I wasn’t smart enough. I wasn’t skinny enough. I wasn’t popular enough.

I remember saying, “Sheesh, God. Proverbs 31 sucks. It’s not fair that I have to do ALL of this stuff and Erwin doesn’t. He just gets to be the husband and be served all the time. I’m so tired. I can’t keep doing this.” 

In hindsight, I realize now Erwin had never demanded these things of me. It was I who put unrealistic expectations on myself, trying desperately to be the good wife. I was trying to live up to the Proverbs 31 Woman and exhausting myself in the process. No wonder I didn’t like her.

Out-of-the-blue, I had one of those almost-audible moments of hearing God’s voice.

He said, “Shauna, you are ALREADY a Proverbs 31 Woman. You see those boots in your cart?”

(I had about six pairs of winter boots in my shopping cart. Walmart was having an incredible end-of-the-season sale, so I was buying every size available because I knew that at least one of my four kids would need them next year.)

“Well, that’s just like verse 15, ‘She rises early and provides for the needs of her household.’  It’s not about being a morning person and working yourself to death—it’s about foreseeing the needs of your family BEFORE THEY ARE EVEN AWARE OF THEIR NEED.

“Your kids don’t even know they need boots next winter, but you do. You ARE a Proverbs 31 Woman!

“I’m proud of you!”

That moment radically changed my perspective on Proverbs 31 and my abilities as a wife and mother.

I realized that I had been looking at this all wrong. It’s not about working harder and performing better. Proverbs 31 isn’t a crazy ‘To Do List’ that I have to get done in one day. NO!

Proverbs 31 is a BLANK CHECK of purpose and destiny that I GET to accomplish in my lifetime!

What, seriously?

I GET to be creative and profitable.

I GET to be strong and beautiful.Tweet This

That’s awesome! I’ll take it!


Let’s be honest here. Comparison is the silent killer of most women.

Comparing ourselves with the super mom down the street, or worse yet, the super mom on Facebook or some mommy blog. It’s no wonder that many of us slip into silent depression and give up hope altogether.

We don’t need to live that way any longer. The enemy has been a master at speaking death to us for far too long. It is high time that we hear the Words of Life that our Father speaks over us.

That’s exactly why I wrote, IDENTITY: Finding the Proverbs 31 Woman in the Middle of Kid Chaos.

We don’t have to hate her anymore. We don’t even have to compete with her. This creative and interactive study into IDENTITY and finding out WHO GOD SAYS WE ARE will have each of us breathing a sigh of relief.

You’ll love this book on your own, but you’ll love it even more when you do it together with friends. Perfect for mom groups and ladies’ Bible studies.

Find yourself in the unconditional love of a Good Father!

Shauna Blaak

Shauna is happily married to her college sweetheart, Erwin, and they have four teenage children. For the last decade, they have been living in South Africa and pastoring the worship ministry at Victory Church in Jeffreys Bay. She knows better than most the challenges that come with being the super mom of an international family. Shauna has a wealth of wisdom to share with other moms who are asking, “Who the heck am I now?” Find her at

Launch Party on Facebook + Giveaway: Saturday, May 6 from 9-11 a.m CST.

Win a copy of the book by sharing the “WIN a BOOK” announcement from the facebook page.

Excerpt used with permission from the author.

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May 6, 2017